So check out my post yesterday on my “bimbo bombing” on Facebook if you don’t understand what this is about. It is amusing. And the comments are great. https://www.facebook.com/bgthomaswriter/posts/978695762220256
HOWEVER… I wanted to say this (and maybe I should have yesterday).
I am not a person to delete a request from someone just because we don’t have any mutual friends. There is a reason for this. In fact, several…
1) Just because a lady is pretty and requests a friendship doesn’t make her a “bimbo.”
2) Coming from science fiction fandom, I know that a lot of readers are very shy and introverted. The worlds the go to when they read make life a lot better. That is certainly true for me when I was in high school and into college. I was different—and not just in the gay thing. I had no friends—well, two—in a graduating class of over 500. When I found fandom, I finally found friends. And when I was brave enough to approach a writer and actually have him respond. OMG!
3) Sometimes, just because a person has requested my friendship when we have no mutual friends, doesn’t mean I am being bimbo, or himbo, bombed. This is why I send a little note that says something like what I said to “Fatou” yesterday. Something like this:
“Hey there. I saw your friend request. We don’t have any mutual friends. How did you find me? Are you one of my readers?”
Because sometimes these friend requests are legitimate. Sometimes they are like me, when I first discovered fandom, and they are reaching out, hearts in their throats, to a writer that the love or who has touched them. It took a lot of courage. A few times I’m the first they’ve approached—or the first who responded.
4) Several times now this has resulted in some very sweet exchanges where my suspicions were confirmed, including a gentleman who had been married for years and his wife had recently died and he was trying to build the courage to come out and my books had helped him a lot. Also, a young man who is overweight and figured he might as well stay in the closet because no man would ever want him—and because I often write stories about bears or men without perfect bodies, he did come out. He said one of my stories made him cry with joy.
So what if I had NOT responded to these friend requests?
This doesn’t excuse Fatou Jassey of course. But just saying.