Resolution #2: I Will Stop Dwelling on Things That Upset Me!

A biggie for me is that I want to give up dwelling on things or people that upset me. Things I cannot change. People’s behaviors I can’t do anything about. Dwelling on these things upsets me, which of course, raises my stress level, heart rate (not in a good way), makes me tired and affects my health in so very many ways.

Of course, the biggest stress in my life is the Evil Team Leader. The countless ways that he has to make my life miserable.

But then…does he really? If I remember what I said yesterday here, life includes suffering, what the real suffering is how I react to these situations. Do I dwell on them? Wrestle with them? Toss them over and over and over and over in my mind? Do I think about them? Talk about them? Let them fill my existence?

The ETL will make sure I have job I hate most. He is doing it to upset me. And, that was what really upset me! Thereby giving him so much control over my life! Why would I let me do that? I let him get to me!

The Law of Attraction teachings state that what we think about, we bring about. “It” doesn’t understand words like “don’t.” So, when we think and think and think that we don’t want to be late for work, for instance, we sadly and actually are sending the message, “I want to be late, I want to be late, I want to be late.” An alternative would be, “I am on time, I’m on plenty of time. Time to spare.” Then I am sending out the message that I will be on time, and being on time is the fate that is drawn to me.

When I think that I don’t want a ticket, I am sending out ticket drawing wishes. When I send out how I don’t want the restaurant to be out of my favorite dish, I am in fact sending out the message that I want the restaurant to be out of my favorite dish. “It” doesn’t understand “don’t.” Instead, I shall be thinking and being thankful for my favorite dish and it should always be there.

So, I resolve to stop thinking about how much I don’t want to be around the ELT. Get rid of ill thoughts (which are constant) toward the man. I must stop talking, talking, talking, talking about him. Because the message I am sending out is that I want more of the ELT and all he represents. I will stop, I must stop, dwelling on him. Stop thinking about him in any way I can. Don’t vent about him. Don’t wonder about him. and do not wish him ill. Cleanse my mind of him and remember that suffering he brings in my own doing. If he is purposely doing thing to me that he knows I hate, and I react to them, they bring him utter joy! When I ignore him or do not let the ornery, evil little things he does get to me, he’ll stop doing them.

I will stop dwelling on things that upset me. Everything from what happened in a book or TV show or movie to people driving crazy in traffic to reflecting on things my ex did to me or a friend who is no longer a friend or a President I did not vote for. I am not going to draw that energy to me.

And, if this “drawing” and “energy” stuff is all New Age mumbo-jumbo? Well, that’s okay; Because there is one thing that is undeniable for me. Since I chose this path, I’ve been happier than anytime in my life. And not dwelling on things I can’t do anything about is plain old less stressful, agitating, agonizing and unstable.

And that’s a lot.


3 thoughts on “Resolution #2: I Will Stop Dwelling on Things That Upset Me!

  1. Bravo to you, Ben. And may I make a small suggestion: how about renaming the ETL to something that doesn’t connote negativity. Maybe he’s a really unhappy man, has a lousy marriage, has some illness that can’t be cured, had a horrible childhood — I don’t know, maybe he just feels small and you “help” him feel bigger and more powerful and happier. What do you think?

    • I should go on to say that I have given this man every single chance. The reason I started the road to recovery to get Ben back is when I took that tact of “killing him with kindness” and genuinely trying to take some interest in his life. And still he tried to get me fired a few weeks ago by telling management that I hit him with a forklift. It was a traumatizing couple of weeks. I finally got past that. It is generally agreed that this man is so far down the path he’s gone that he is almost certainly “unfixable.” He gets utter joy (laughing) whenever his actions cause harm to others. So many have tried to help him. I refuse now to do anything. He is not my load to bear anymore. I won’t. I have to look after me. But I will consider coming up with a new nick name for him. Calling his The Evil Team Leader does harm to me as well and give him power over me. That I can change. Thanks for loving me. I know that was what this was about.

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